Thursday, August 13, 2009

Across the Universe


This movie sucks big donkey balls. It’s nothing more than a contrived vehicle to get from one Beatles song to the next. They even named the main characters Jude and Lucy!! Gimme a break. What’s worse is that the performers CAN’T EVEN SING!!! They’re off pitch and seem to miss notes…frequently. Moreover, the producers got the bright idea of changing the songs to make them, perhaps, more contemporary friendly. Look, I’m more of a Stones fan, but even I know that you just don’t mess with the Beatles. I don’t particularly like musicals to begin with, but this one is just a disaster. The visuals aren’t even that compelling, which is apparently what they tried to market it on (since they ruined the songs, botched the writing, and hired actors who look better than they can sing, which, believe me, says a lot!). CRAP, CRAP, CRAP. Do not rent it, NetFlix it, OnDemand it or even watch it if it happens to be on cable. You’re better off with reruns of Full House. The wife and I watched it On Demand, and both really wanted to blow our brains out after ten minutes.
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About Me

After graduating from the University of Texas Austin in 2000 with a degree in Radio-Television-Film, I spent five unsuccessful years in LA trying to make my way as a film/video FCP editor. After eventually coming to terms with failure (or defeat), I decided I’d try something else: law school. So, after completing my second year of study, I felt that I should try to do something a little more creative to balance out all the analytical thinking going on in my head. Smokin’ Joe’s in the MOW is the result of that effort. There’s an old joke that goes, “what do you call someone who desperately wants to be in a band, but sucks at guitar: a music critic.” I guess that's now me. While perhaps this all seems quite self-loathing, I fell it grants me the freedom to say just about whatever I feel like about OTHER people's creative efforts. While I have great respect for those with enough courage to go out and attempt to make films, sometimes you gotta call 'em as you see 'em. Cheers!